This isn’t “merch.” This is a direct line into the glitter-streaked bloodstream of a recycled plastic deity with a shocking horn and trust issues.

Every item in this shop is forged from magic, mischief, and the harsh economic reality of keeping a 800-pound LED-saturated unicorn alive, mobile, and fabulous. These aren’t bargain-bin stickers. They’re miniature investments in the absurdly costly, totally worth it task of unicorn life support.

🛠️ Steel needs welding. LEDs need rewiring. Horns need recalibration to continue delivering safe but spicy shocks to the curious masses. Fiber optic manes don’t reattach themselves. And transportation? Ever tried trailering a mythological icon across state lines during wind season? Spoiler: it’s not cheap.

Yes, prices are a bit high. That’s because we use print-on-demand to keep this operation lean, burnout-free, and actually functional. Every dollar goes straight into keeping Tiny shining like the radioactive rainbow warrior she is.

So go ahead. Fill your cart. Fund the myth. Fuel the mission. Feed the unicorn.

And remember: you’re not just buying art.

You’re becoming part of the legend.